When all else fails:

go after the gays:

I understand the idea of trying to galvanize values voters, what I don't understand are the values they're presenting.

Re: Foley - "It's a private matter. Focusing on someone's sex life is lascivious. There are more important things on the national agenda, like winning the War on TerrorIraq."

Re: The War on TerrorIraq: "Shh! Don't talk about the War." (unless you're the President, then talk about the War and pretend you're going to be more flexible just to get your party past the next round of elections)

And, just so the masses don't recognize the inconsistency, punt:

Re: Gay Marriage - "Marriage is an institution between a man and a woman, and we must preserve it to maintain our healthy society"

The sad thing is, it just might work.